Oh family

After five days in south central PA, I'm back to the big apple. But not for long- I leave in 2 hours for my chilled-out-eat-drink-and-be-merry celebration in upstate New York. A generous friend has invited me and several of my bocce teammates to relax and not answer our cell phones for two days. Sweet.

But before I go, check out these pics of my Christmas.

HOW are we still single?


Again. I mean c'mon.


Somebody's sleepy.


Weeeeee!


Coffeecoffeecoffee

Nas-Tee

I am so grateful for New York's smoke ban. I was looking forward to it immensely before moving, but now, having gone to a bar or two outside of NY, I'm even more thankful. I find cigarette smoking to be absolutely repulsive. It's a total dealbreaker for me. I don't date smokers, and I really don't know many smokers. The few smokers that I do know are very courteous with their cancer-causing habit, and don't light up in front of my face. But still, it's really gross.
Last night, I went to a bar with some hometown friends for a quick beer. We were only in the bar for an hour, and I was unable to breath, I stunk, and I was just generally disgusted. Also, I couldn't sing this morning. That's when it becomes a real problem for me.
I don't get it- it's not sexy, it's not healthy, and it's not cheap. So why do people do it? For the same reason that I can't control my Christmas cookie intake? I doubt it. Whatever the reason may be, I'm eternally glad that I'm living in a city where I don't have to swallow smoke with my fish.

Happy Christmas...

...to all you Christians out there, and all you non-Christians who celebrate Christmas. For the Jews, the festival of lights has ended. But I enjoyed a wonderful Christmas Eve dinner as one of 2, maybe 3, gentiles in attendance. Srsly- latkes are where it is AT. Latkes, and the ham that my mom is cooking right now. My oh my- the whole house smells wonderful.
After finishing up my 2.5 hour Christmas Eve church service around 1 AM, I got home just in time to get 3 hours of sleep before waking up to head to Penn Station. Now, securing a car service to retrieve me at 5:45 AM wasn't a real problem- or so I thought. I woke up with everything packed and ready to go, dragged my 1283781273 lb. suitcase and bag full 'o presents down the stairs, and waited. And waited. And waited.
After two calls to the car company- assuring me the driver was on his way- I started to panic. It's not a long drive to Penn Station from my apartment, especially with no traffic, but I still had to print out my train ticket and find the gate, all while dragging this gigantic suitcase around the train station.
At 6:05 (TWENTY MINUTES after the car was due to arrive), I took matters into my own hands, and just as I was about to hail a cab, the car pulled up. I know it's Christmas, but damn- I had to let the dude know that my mood wasn't merry.

Driver: "Sorry, miss! Sorry!"
Me: "Whatever. I have a 6:30 train to catch. Step on it."
Driver: "No one wants to work on Christmas, miss. That's why I was late."
Me: "Yeah, well, that's why I reserved this car in ADVANCE. I didn't just call you 25 mins ago expecting you to be here. Can you please drive faster? It's 6:12."
Driver: A bunch of spanish I didn't understand.
Me: Rolling eyes and still panicing. "If I miss my train, my Christmas will NOT be merry, sir."

........................
......................................

We arrive at Penn Station at 6:24. I literally RUN down the escalator, knocking several bums out of my way. I kind of felt bad about that. I printed my ticket out just in time to glance at the train board to see that my train didn't leave until 6:45. :)

Hammerin' it Home

Just in case you aren't sick of reading about how cool Boccismo! is, check this out. Neato.

I am seriously in love

As if I couldn't love Jews anymore, Gabriel Delahaye proves that he is so dreamy. GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. Not only is he the author of my favorite Gawker column, he also writes this. Total. Hilarious. Dreamboat.


I'm seriously in love.

Top Ten

OK, folks. I actually have a lot of work to do today before leaving early for rehearsal, but JUST in time for stocking stuffers is my Top Ten 2006 list. Honestly, it's really in no particular order. And I'm not writing blurbs about each album because I don't really care all that much. So, if you don't have all (or any) of these records, hook yo'self up!

10. The Decemberists- Crane Wife
9. Justin Timberlake- Futuresex/Lovesounds
8. Belle and Sebastian- The Life Pursuit
7. Girl Talk- Night Ripper
6. The Knife- Silent Shout
5. Midlake- The Trails of Van Occupanther
4. Junior Boys- This is Goodbye
3. The Flaming Lips- At War with the Mystics
2. Beck- The Information
1. Mew- And the Glass Handed Kites

Good morning

Dear FDNY EMT,

You were undoubtedly on your way to help someone who was sick on the train, or a homeless person, or some drunk fool at 8:00 in the morning. I'd like to take this time to thank you for looking amazingly hot while carrying that stretcher behind you while walking along the 1 train track this morning. It made my commute absurdly less hellish. Oh, and thanks for all the good work you do, but more importantly for looking like a total dreamboat while doing it. God bless servicemen.

With love,
Hilary

Maybe 1 more sit-up, or 2. 1 or 2.

Saturday night, I saw the Parsons Dance Company perform at the Joyce theater. A friend of mine has season tickets to the theater, and invited me along for the last performance of the season. I used to be a dancer- many years ago- so I was pretty jazzed.
Parsons is a modern dance company, and to be honest, I'm not the BIGGEST fan of modern as opposed to ballet, but I digress. The show was impressive to say the least, with some of the hardest bodies I've ever seen in real life. Especially this dude. You can't really tell from that picture, but homeboy was r-i-p-p-e-d. Srsly. I've never seen someone in real life with that many muscles and no fat. It was pretty amazing. His big number was a piece called "Caught", which is based on strobe lighting. Basically, the idea is to leap when the light is on, and land when the light is off: the effect is floating. It literally looked like he was floating. And he was jumping 5 ft off the ground. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
The rest of the performance was pretty great as well. After the show, my friend and I planned to have a drink, and as we walked past the theater, we saw some of the dancers leaving. My friend admitted to being a tiny bit star struck and wanted to ask them to join us for a beer.
"I guess they're just regular people", he said, "but how cool would that be to hang out with Parsons dancers?"
"Pretty sweet", I said. "Oh, and by the way, are you ready to audition for the company? I figured you'd be the next guy dancing 'Caught'."
"Totally. All I need to do is just 1 or 2 more situps- 1 or 2."

Boot scootin' boogie

Remember these?


Merry Christmas to me. I've finally had it with my black boots. They've been landing me on shakey ground for months now, giving me ankle/foot pain, and generally being a pain in the ass. Why do I keep wearing them? Because my beloved black pumps bit the dust last month, my other black pumps are too high to wear to work every day, and these boots are pretty much the only (at one time) comfortable black dress shoe I have. So, I bought a new pair. See above. Only in black.

They are slated to arrive today. They couldn't arrive here fast enough, as I totally ate it today on the way to work. Thank God I didn't break my ankle; more importantly, thank God no one saw me fall. So, next up on the Merry Christmas to me, I've already spent too much money list- a new Ipod. Why does everything have to go to hell at once?

Big mouth strikes again

More quality one-liners from "Fred":

me: k, so
4 or 8 GB nano?
i dont really NEED 8 GB
i think 4
Fred: my girlfriend has a 4 mini. damn thing filled up fast
me: ya?
Fred: how big is the one you have now?
me: 1 GB
Fred: what do you have 2 albums on there?
me: no JERK; like 240 songs. i change it up every week
Fred: wow, well throw your flintstone ipod out the window
me: hahahahahaahhaah! it was a gift! my friends gave it to me for my birthday 3 years ago (And that was the best gift ever, peeps!!)
me: i like it small for gym purposes. i dont want to carry around a big one. i stick my shuffle in my bra
Fred: uhmm well since you are used to the zach morris ipod 4 gig should be plenty

Short End of the Stick

Now, if you know me, you know I don't get too upset over rejection letters. What's the point? You never know what they are looking for, and 9.8 times out of 10, you ain't gonna get the job. So why waste time and energy crying over spilt milk?

That being said, I have a slight problem with audition times. First person of the day? Good luck. They are still waiting for the coffee to kick in and deciding which muffin looks best. Last person of the day? (like me last night). Terrible slot. They are tired and irritable, and they've already heard 25 sopranos. You might as well walk in topless and sing Hey Big Spender- that would be more memorable. The best slot, undoubtedly, is the middle of the day or late morning, after they have had something to eat. My JOC audition was a perfect example: they had taken a 10 minute break before I sang; time to use the restroom, grab a bagel, and walk around for a few minutes. Result? I felt like I belonged there and like they actually wanted to hear me sing.

I can understand how days upon days of auditions get boring. The same arias. Some people good, some people bad. They've already made their decision with the first phrase. But, is it asking too much to at least ACT interested? Can you refrain from yawning and playing with your papers while I'm bustin out some Susanna? And worst of all- stop talking during the recit.

If I'm ever on the other side of the table, I'm going to do my best to remain engaged and focused. If that means not auditioning 150 singers for 4 slots, then so be it. If it means only hearing one aria (which thankfully they did do last night), then so be it. And if it means having my co-auditioner slap the hell outta me for yawning, consider it done.

You wish you were as cool as me

Think playing bocce ball is for old dudes? Think again. Boccismo!'s house of destroying is the coolest. The slope is dope.

The End of the Road

There is nothing like a gigantic feeling of relief. You know- that feeling you get when something so huge and important, that you realize was not nearly as nerve-wracking as you imagined it to be, is over. Done. And you were a success. That, my friends, is how I felt on Saturday morning, circa 11:15 AM, after my JOC audition.
I had not been as nervous as I was for Juilliard since auditioning for grad schools. And I think I was even more nervous for this than my Peabody audition. All week I had stress-related dreams, and my stomach was in knots. My father (who was visiting for the weekend) and I had lengthy conversations about audition and performance anxiety, and how to get over the psychological hurdles associated with performing. He said, "When you breath in, you're a machine. When you being to sing (or in his case, play), you are an artist." So true. I thought about that as I sang for the 10 people in the JOC audition. And you know what? It worked. I only had to sing 2 arias (GIGANTIC relief), and I felt like I represented the best version of myself on that day. That is really all we can do. My goal was not to outdo anyone else, but was to sing well and present myself like the professional I am. Mission accomplished.

In other non-related news, Boccismo!'s winning streak has come to an end. In the semi-finals on Saturday, we won our first game, but lost the second. Unfortunately, this means that we will not be playing in the championships, but I may go just to watch the final brawl. We did not go down without a fight. We played some pretty tight games of bocce, with a rather large crowd present. My dad cheered us on to victory with a beer in hand. It was pretty awesome to see my teammates high-fiving my dad. Good guys.

After the game, I treated my dad to dinner at Pastis , which was great. Having a friend who works for the GM is always helpful when reservations are needed. 2 people, 8:00 on Saturday, corner booth? You got it.

So, onward and upward.

Ich spreche gern Deutsch

Oder nein.

However, ich spreche enough gern Deutsch to land me in Level two, here at Columbia U. This is a relief- I really didn't want to have to start all over with beginning German, as I can say a few things in the language. The placement test was pretty difficult- in fact, I didn't understand ONE WORD of the reading exercise. It was all about regions of Germany, and where Kurt Weil is from- OK, maybe I understood a few words. The point is it was hard. But I guess since I know the difference between Schwester and Tochter, I pass go.
The sweetest part is, pending on my boss' approval, I'll be able to take the class during the work day, so I don't have to give up 3 nights a week. I'm kind of excited to have homework again; and to gawk at 19 year old boys.

Love is Hell

I am happy to report that I was sufficiently rocked last night at the Ryan Adams show. He was sober enough to completely rock the house, although he only really played for a little over an hour. Boo. He was also wearing knee-high patent leather goth boots, which made him appear to be 8 ft tall. Apparently, the night before he showcased some silver glitter knee-high boots.
Opening for Mr. Adams were The Little Willies. Norah Jones does back up vocals, and I must admit- I'm not normally a fan of her music or voice, but in this context- I liked her. She has a great sound for bluesy alt-country and Willie Nelson covers.
The drama of the evening occured when a rowdy fan in the balcony (where I was sitting) was asked to leave and shouted, "hey Ryan! I'm getting kicked out for cheering". To which Ryan responded, "If you got kicked out, then why are you still here?" Rock.

Here's what he looked like last night:

Do I even need to say it again?

Boccismo! won again. We are a good team, people. No, a GREAT team. After our pre-bocce hibachi dinner, we knocked the other team's balls into place as we secured the win in a pretty easy 30 mins or so. One more round before finals, so keep rooting for the winners (us), so that we land a spot in the championship (AKA, we're gonna be #1 in the league).

I'm really glad I was asked to be a part of the team- I've made some super cool new friends, fell in love with Brooklyn's greatest neighborhood, and found out that I'm actually pretty good at a "sport". Rock.

It's a reunion

Ahhh the sweet sounds of gossip, geeking out, and uproarious laughter: it was a Peabody Throats reunion. Although all original class of '04 (and Lesley) grads were not all present, it sure was a good time. We laughed, drank, laughed a lot more, gossiped, re-hashed, talked about auditions and gigs and life; I think we all needed it. As cheesy as it sounds, it's a relief to know that we will be in each other's lives for the long haul. This bid'ness is too small for enemies (although bitchery came shining through last night)- ya gotta keep your friends close.
So, until the next time we all reunite (spring break Florida??!!?!?!?), keep it real; or Nakia will fuck you up.

Relieved

A rep switch is indeed allowed for Juilliard- commence the cheering! I must admit; I haven't been this nervous for an audition since Peabody. Even though it's not technically school, it's like a school audition. Remember back, people (peabs- 5 years ago??); a school audition lasts about 15-20 minutes. It will seem like a lifetime compared to every audition I've done since then which runs about 5-7 minutes.

Aaaaaanyway, I've scheduled a massage for myself 2 days before the audition. Not only is it way overdue, but next week is the busiest week in December for me, so relaxation is key.

That is all.