Knee-slapper

From my hardcore Episcopalian Uncle:


A man in a Florida supermarket tried to buy half a head of lettuce. The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce. The man persisted and asked to see the manager.

The boy said he would ask his manager about it.

Walking in the back room, the boy said to his manager “Some asshole wants to buy half a head of lettuce.”

As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so the added “And this gentlemen has kindly offered to buy the other half ".

The manager approved the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager said to the boy “I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think and react this quick. Where are you from, son?”

“Canada, sir.” the boy replied.

“Well, why did you leave Canada?” the manager asked.

The boy said, “Sir, there’s nothing but whores and hockey players up there. ”

“Really?” said the manager. “My wife is from Canada.”

“No shit?” replied the boy. “Who’d she play for?”